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A NEW HOPE
(Number 1, kids! Save it! Maybe it'll be worth something!)
Call me Ishmael. This is the introduction for the phattest 'zine station for
the 'zine nation, beotch. This is just the introduction, so don't expect too
much. We'll just use this for, well, an introduction. This 'zine is being
co-written by Abraxas and Biafra, and we'll probably get more authors as we
travel down the long & windy road of 'zine maturation. Abraxas is writing this
intro in case you care. I'm a Junior in high school and Biafra is a Sophomore.
That's all you need to know. We're secretive like that. You can reach VOMIT on
the internet through
[email protected]. I proposed actually writing something
besides an introduction for VOMIT #1 but Biafra says that we have to make as
many as possible. Remember, kids, it's quantity, not quality here at VOMIT.
We're writing this 'zine because we're not athletic, have lots of free time,
and have lots of stuff to bitch about. Some issues will not be funny at all.
(Case in point, VOMIT #1!) Biafra's will never be funny, because he is not as
|<-r4d as me. Mine will be funny depending on my moods. Right now I'm starving
lonely, no one likes me, I have no friends, I'm ugly, I've never touched a
girl, and my feet itch, so this issue won't be funny. OK. I'm sick of this
intro (As are you). Let's get to VOMIT #2. I have just one request for you
loyal readers of VOMIT. (You must be loyal to have read this far.) We'd like a
new ASCII of our name.
Index
(Just in case you missed some issues along the way)
______________________________________________________________________________
VOMIT 1..................................................................Intro
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Collect 'em all!
