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      |                                                              |
      |                -- Cable Theft Made Easy --                   |
      |                                                              |
      |     The title says it all..this phile will teach you the     |
      |  quickest and easiest method of pilfering Cable Television!  |
      |                                                              |
      |               _| Compiled by: Acid Reign |_                  |
      |                | Designed by: Riff Raff  |                   |
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                           (*) An OverView (*)
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    This phile will tell you how to "customize" your television to receive
every channel offered by your local Cable Television company without having
to build your own cable receiver...in fact, it's so easy, ANYBODY can do it,
and it's so obvious, you'll hate yourself for not thinking of it sooner...

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                          (*) The Procedure (*)
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     1.  First, call your local Cable Company up and tell them that you
         want to alter your current subscription by adding on all the other
         channels offered which you are not currently receiving.

     2.  Next, wait until you start receiving your "new" channels, and
         then call your Cable Company back.  Tell them you didn't like this
         new subscription, you don't want to get it anymore, and you would
         just like to receive the basic package from now on.

     3.  Once you are off of the phone, disconnect the main cable from
         your cable box, (NOT the cable that runs from the box to the
         television set, the one that runs into the cable itself.)  Keep
         this disconnected for two or three days.

     4.  After a few days, reconnect the cable to the box.  You will now
         receive every channel...free of charge!

                       ---------------------------

      NOTE: For one billing, you WILL have to pay for the "complete"
            package...but, after that, you only pay for your new order,
            the "basic," or "poor man's" package!

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                           (*) Why It Works (*)
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    Todays cable boxes are used to unscramble select signals transmitted
thru the cable.  Your BOX determines which channels you can and which channels
you do not receive simply through remote programming from the Cable Company's
main computer.  So, whenever they change an order, they simply re-program the
subscriber's box, (from their office), so that it can decode the new channels'
signals.  Where, in the past, they only used to send the signals which you had
subscribed to, they now send all signals but only let the box decode the
selected channels.  Therefore, the box, AS IT IS, always has the potential to
decode every signal which is sent by the Cable Company.

    The Cable Company has no way of knowing if their signals ever get thru to
your box at all, so, once you have disconnected the cable from your box, the
Company will not be in contact with it at all, and therefore will not be able
to change its current configuration.  Therefore, your Cable Company will THINK
that they have changed your box, and, resultantly, THINK that you are only
able to receive the basic package, when you really are still receiving your
"elite" configuration -- the basic set with all the "pay" stations which you
ordered previously, such as HBO, ShowTime, PlayBoy, and CineMax...for free!

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  -Cable Theft- is a TradeMark of DeadMan Operations and Activities, Inc.

       (K)opyWrong 1986 -- D.O.A.                  All Rights Phucked
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            (*) This Phile Was Compiled by the Phollowing (*)

        Acid Reign      Riff Raff     Sid Vicious    Kable Kommie
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This Article was downloaded from the Unet by Dr. Strangelove. If anyone
knows anything more about Captain Midnight, let me know; I would like to
find this guy.
I can be contacted on the Matrix, 415-922-2008

Distributed in part by:
                         Skeleton Crue 510-376-8060
             !!Get on the Band Wagon before it RUNS YOU DOWN!!
   The LAST bastion of abusive thought in ALL of Suburban West Coast!
                                  (PHNORD)