F I D O N E W S -- Vol.12 No.36 (04-Sep-1995)
+----------------------------+-----------------------------------------+
| A newsletter of the | ISSN 1198-4589 Published by: |
| FidoNet BBS community | "FidoNews" BBS |
| _ | +1-519-570-4176 |
| / \ | |
| /|oo \ | |
| (_| /_) | |
| _`@/_ \ _ | |
| | | \ \\ | Editors: |
| | (*) | \ )) | Donald Tees 1:221/192 |
| |__U__| / \// | Sylvia 1:221/194 |
| _//|| _\ / | |
| (_/(_|(____/ | |
| (jm) | Newspapers should have no friends. |
| | -- JOSEPH PULITZER |
+----------------------------+-----------------------------------------+
| Submission address: editors 1:1/23 |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
| MORE addresses: |
| |
| submissions=>
[email protected] |
| Don --
[email protected] |
| Sylvia
[email protected] |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
| For information, copyrights, article submissions, |
| obtaining copies of fidonews or the internet gateway faq |
| please refer to the end of this file. |
+----------------------------------------------------------------------+
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Table of Contents
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1. Editorial..................................................... 1
2. Articles...................................................... 2
Regarding election procedures in FidoNet.................... 2
Dear Reverend Visage,....................................... 2
PEACE Net advertisement..................................... 4
3. Fidonews Information.......................................... 6
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Editorial
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FidoNews 12-36 Page: 2 04 Sep 1995
I have a note from Chris Baker in my inbound that the policy wars
are about to start again. Look for a mail buldge as the next
few issues of the snooze come through.
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Articles
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Regarding election procedures in FidoNet.
by Fredrik Bennison
2:205/300,
[email protected]
In response to Bob Germer's article in FidoNews 1235, I'd like to point
out the need for rules and guidelines concerning these types of
elections. They are apparently needed to prevent bickering and
discussions on whether a Coordinator has been correctly anointed or
approved or whatever.
In Z2, we recently adopted a Policy addition called NC_ELECT.ZIP <V1.00
Mar.05 1995> which defines the correct procedure when electing a new Net
Coordinator. The rules therein can just as easily be applied to a
regional election, as we did in Sweden (R20) earlier this summer.
Perhaps the time has come to adopt such a document in Z1 as well, to
safeguard those who _do_ care about democracy and fair play at Net and
Region level.
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Dear Editor-Beings,
The following is submitted by Charles Herriot(1:163/110) who
managed to get off a lucky shot with the tranq gun and
brought Doc Logger to ground...or at least near enough out
of low earth orbit for him to lash together another
Snoozlood. Like, roll da' flic, Sylvia....
Dear Reverend Visage,
It has been another savage and ugly week in the realm of
electronic madness. I think that I have been suffering from
the ravages of another Cape Buffalo hunt where my only
armament was a nerf bat. Troll-baiting just isn't what it
used to be, Visage, and I am sure that you can appreciate
that we need to release more vats of NoPlotz into the
waterways of the world.
I thought that I would be real friendly-like and civilized
by posting a message that would make me at one with 99.999%
of Fidonet. So I posted the following message:
"Hi" (shuffles feet nervously and looks around the room) "My
name's Doc and I'm a Quotaholic."
FidoNews 12-36 Page: 3 04 Sep 1995
(polite, but scattered applause)
"It has been 4,075 days since my last Quote."
(murmurs of "Praise da Lard and pass the ketchup.")
"Sure, I was probably like the rest of you. Thinking, just
one more Quote... I don't *really* need it. Just one little
Quote, a little pick-me-up so that I could feel that I was
really writing a message when I appended a one line grunt
at the end."
(nervous, delirium tremens shuffling from the back seats.)
"Oh yeah, I told myself. Those days when I went on a bender
and quoted 63 consecutive messages while only adding 75
lines of original text... those were just exceptions. I had
it under control. I could quit any time... easy. Piece of
cake.
Hell, just a coupla swiped Emoticons, and a signature macro
giving all of Fidonet the incredibly useless esoterica
about my Internet address... they made me feel whole,
almost literate. Was I kidding myself? Was I fooling
anyone?"
(an unsettled buzz emerges from the front rows)
"Sure, all of my friends, whacked out of Quotes, they all
saw nothing wrong. 'No problem >No Problem >Like, what it
is' they wheezed in delirium, not realizing that the
cerebral atrophy was reducing them to Neanderthalic
oozings. Damned right that all of my messages were such a
confusing array of quote symbols and misaligned text that
they looked like Antfarms. I had nothing to say, so I said
it with Quotes. I quoted pathlines and $eenbys, I quoted
myself being quoted... sometimes I quoted whole blank
screens just to get a fix."
(cross-eyed glares from the middle pews)
"And when that wasn't enough. When I just couldn't get lost
in a flotsam of Quotes, I turned to "cutisms." Oh yeah, I
see a few nods of recognition. 'Fess up, we've all used
'em, chickapee. We've used 'em, we've abused 'em, and we've
contused them, chickapee. 'Cause they're *cute*,
chickapee... no, I mean CUTE, chickapee...Cute in the way
that when you pronounce the word it starts out like the
"COY" in coyote, chickapee. I've been there... down there
in the hog's wallow of degradation and despair. It ain't
pretty."
( a bead of perspiration dangles from the upper lip area of
the fourth row, fifth barstool, inhabitant.)
FidoNews 12-36 Page: 4 04 Sep 1995
"And then, like a vision it came to me. All lit up like a
'57 Chevy with red pompoms all around the windshield, with
purple running lights, and Gerry Jeff Walker beltin' out
"Pissin' In The Wind" on the 8-track... it spoke to me...
it called to me. And this friends, was what that vision was:
It was the <RETURN> key. And it was singin' out to me in a
voice so sweet and compelling that Reba McEntire couldn't
have done it any better. And this is what it said friends;
it said: 'Lean on me.'
'Lean on me' it said... and it spoke in a subtle language
that told me that if I just listened, and acted, I could
lean on that <RETURN> button and watch 279 messages of
complete and utter gibberish scroll by and I wouldn't have
missed a single sentient thought. The bush by the road at
Damascus never burned so bright, nor spoke so clearly.
So... so friends, I got right down there on my knees and I
thanked the Lard (and Bill Gates, just in case), and I gave
up my sinnin' life of Quoting. I can write whole sentences
now... whole paragraphs, without Quotin'. I is saved..
SAVED I say, saved and salvationed and I jus' wanna thank
ya'll for listenin'.
(deadly silence)
* * * *
Visage, half my stuffed armadillo collection says that the
incredibly subtle point of my message will be missed. This
will depress me and I may have to go out on the ice floes to
club a few baby seals to regain my good humour.
I must go Visage, your secretary is screeching at me in her
usual buzz-saw tones. Her irate state has really nothing at
all to do with the fact that something called a "Gumbie Cat"
relieved itself in her cornflakes. As the good and decent
people that we are, Visage, I suggest that we send her to
Texas.
Regards,
Doc Logger,
Giant Clam School Of Ballet,
Furlang Island, South Pacific
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PEACE Net advertisement
by Kevin Bush
FIDO 1:326/217
BBS, ACTS 29: Online, Lyman Maine, 207-499-0165
Yet another new FTS/QWK mail network.
PEACE Net
FidoNews 12-36 Page: 5 04 Sep 1995
"to promote peaceful coexistence through understanding"
I am pleased to announce the formation of PEACE Net.
Peace Net is a new, small, QWK/FTS network. our aim is to promote
peaceful coexistance through understanding. Everyone is welcome.
Peace net is a network where people of diverse Spiritual, Political,
and cultural differences may gather for intelligent, friendly
discussion, and have a little fun while we are at it.
We believe that it *IS* possible for people with deeply held
convictions to gather, exchange ideas, and even form friendships.
We also believe that it is healthy to do so. If you agree, consider
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What is on the net ?
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There are conferences with a Spiritual flavor, others are political,
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gab and get to know one another. There are two conferences dedicated
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Administration
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The network will be run by consensus by the participating Sysops. The
conferences will be run by the appointed moderators. There are a few
common sense rules. The main rule, strictly enforced is....
"Absolutely no Flaming or Bashing, this includes People, Political
Parties, Religions, Software, whatever. There will be no brow beating
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If you would like more information on peace net..
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or Download PEACE*.* at
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Megalopolis BBS (801) 489-1946/1947/7910
FidoNews 12-36 Page: 6 04 Sep 1995
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Fidonews Information
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------- FIDONEWS MASTHEAD AND CONTACT INFORMATION ----------------
Editors: Donald Tees, Sylvia Maxwell
Editors Emeritii: Thom Henderson, Dale Lovell,
Vince Perriello, Tim Pozar
Tom Jennings
"FidoNews" BBS
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FidoNews 12-36 Page: 7 04 Sep 1995
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-Tom Jennings
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