My health has taken a turn for the worse these past few years and I am
now permanently disabled and unemployable due to health. I have had
the displeasure of fighting with Social Security for the past two
years and not having any income since January 2020. It's not been
easy nor fun but in the process of becoming disabled and changing my
worldview because of it, I have learned to slow down.
I now have seemingly unlimited time to do what I want if my health
isn't constantly interfering with me, making me either hurt constantly
or sleep for 14 hours. When I am feeling decent, I still enjoy
working on all of my BBS-related hobbies and, when I can get my radio
fixed, amateur radio even with being in an apartment.
However, the fight that was once in me is gone. I have to manage
stress carefully. I have a blood clot (DVT) in the artery in my right
leg that threatens to move if I get too upset or too physically
active. It could go to my lungs and suffocate me to death, to my
heart or brain blocking the blood flow to either organ and killing
me. Real fun to think about this, believe me.
So that's why I have backed off of a lot of things in Fidonet. I
simply can't handle it anymore. Now this doesn't mean that I am
leaving or anything (you can't get rid of me that easy) but it does
mean that if there's a problem I can't fix, I'll try to avoid the
situation altogether.
Thankfully, things are somewhat calmer these days and I really enjoy
shooting the breeze in different echoes. It's nice to spend time
chatting. I enjoy publishing the FidoGazette even if I don't have a
lot of content to publish (yes, this means you: where is your article
for the FG? <G>). I guess it's the satisfaction of having a routine.
And there you have it as I see it.
Constructive criticism and comments are welcomed. Letters to the
editor are also welcomed. Netmail is welcomed also but I prefer the
other methods first (I accept crashmail via BinkD). Leave your
flamethrower and vulgarities at the door or I will just delete your
message.
