Subj : Groupies
To   : All
From : Sean Dennis
Date : Fri Jan 28 2022 12:33 am

You know, I never thought I'd have my own personal set of groupies but as you've recently noticed, my return to the FidoGazette have brought the loose screws out of Fidonet's woodwork to attack me with their racist and xenophobic (dare I say a European thing) ways.

Even though Ward, Michiel, Winifred--erm, I mean Wilfred, and Oliver all live
in my system's twit filter, I know that I live rent-free in their heads every
day of their pitiful existances.  They toil away, attacking me mercilessly,
showing how vulgar they are and making a mockery of themselves and all they
suppose to represent...but all the time they spend daily on me makes me
honored to have such dedicated groupies.  They may all be fools but they're
all -MY- fools!  Such devotion to me.  I don't know what I did to deserve all
of these hateful, xenophobic, and slanderous messages but I appreciate all of
the time they all waste daily trying to get a rise out of me.

What can I say?  I'm JUST THAT DAMN GOOD.  They are all wasting their time in
my echo, flailing about, bloviating about me...it's so heartwarming to have so
much attention given to me.

You know, I have lived rent-free in Ward's head for over 25 years now.  Such
devotion to me!  I know I've been in Michiel's mind for a decade or two.
Winifred, I mean, Wilfred and Oliver are recent sycopants of Ward's so it's
only been a few years.

I don't know about you all but I feel elated that I have my very own group of
"ex-girlfriend crazay" kind of groupies in Fidonet and they let me live
rent-free in their minds constantly (did I say that already)?  Their making
the policing of Fidonet their lives' work even when Fidonet is a hobby and
should never be taken seriously...

...just like I don't take any of them seriously and neither should you.

They're all xenophobes who hate anyone who doesn't act and think like them
and especially hate Americans.  I guess it's because they weren't bright enough
to come up with the idea of Fidonet themselves.

I sincerely hope that none of them have a heart attack and drop dead from
the fact that they are all my groupies now.

I'll call them all the EuroCuties.  I'm not gay but it's flattering to have
all of these men chasing after me like this!

-- Sean
--- Maximus/2 3.01
* Origin: Outpost BBS (1:18/200)