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Stardate: 20190820.2111 | |
Location: Home Office | |
Input Device: Gemini PDA | |
Audio: Air Conditioner | |
Visual: Not so messy desk. | |
Energy: 40% | |
Mental: 35% | |
Emotional: Tired, full. | |
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Moar self-reliance writing from... | |
31 Journaling Prompts for Building Greater Self-Reliance[1] | |
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Self-Reliance: Day 7 | |
Day 7 | |
Ultimately, we come to self-reliance by forgetting ourselves. | |
It's the kind of self-trust many new parents feel because | |
they finally have this thing outside themselves that matters | |
much more than themselves. We can access it by caring about | |
anything properly (a project, a movement, an idea, a person, | |
etc.). | |
Milton Mayeroff describes this dynamic in On Caring: | |
"Direction that comes from the growth of the other should not | |
be confused with being 'other directed,' where this refers to | |
the kind of conformity in which I lose touch with both myself | |
and the other. Rather, by following the growth of the other, | |
I am more responsive to myself, just as the musician is more | |
in touch with himself when he is absorbed in the needs of the | |
music." | |
Ironically, no matter how physically self-reliant we become, | |
if we never truly care for something | |
outside of ourselves we'll never become self-reliant. | |
What do you care most about? As in, what do you give yourself | |
to most freely? How could you care for it a little more | |
perfectly? How does caring for this thing outside yourself | |
actually help you trust yourself more? | |
My response: | |
This one is an easy one. I give of myself most freely to my | |
family...not so much my extended family, rather my immediate | |
family, my wife and kids. I make myself available to them | |
and usually don't work on my own things if they are at home | |
or awake if it does not involve them. Most of my projects | |
happen when they are asleep or unavailable. | |
Unfortunately, sometimes I give to the point of being | |
unhealthy...putting their needs ahead of mine and sometimes | |
even using them as an excuse or hiding behind them. I have | |
been guilty of using them as an excuse rather than commit to | |
someone else's request for help, which is not so good. I | |
need to keep myself in check more when it comes to those | |
kinds of things. | |
Caring for my family helps me trust myself more because it | |
puts me in a position for growth and gives me opportunities I | |
would have never had if I did not have them. Being | |
responsible in that capacity has not been easy for me, but it | |
has helped me grow up. I think lot of me growing up was a | |
direct result of me having to be responsible for people | |
besides myself Left to my own devices, I probably would not | |
have gotten this far. | |
That's 20. | |
[1]31 Journaling Prompts for Building Greater Self-Reliance | |
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