Once upon a time, in the bustling city of Baghdad, there lived a man named Aliba
ba. Unlike the famous legend where Alibaba had a magic cave full of treasure, th
is Alibaba had something much more valuable in the modern world — a good, old-
fashioned passport.
Now, Alibaba wasn’t a thief, and he didn’t have a bunch of robbers following
him around. But, he did have something much worse to deal with: security checks
You see, Baghdad had recently decided to take airport security to the next lev
el. Instead of the usual one or two checks, Alibaba faced a whole army of forty
security stations that he had to go through just to get to the market.
One fine morning, Alibaba was headed to the Grand Bazaar, looking to buy some fr
esh dates and perhaps a nice rug. Little did he know, his simple trip would turn
into a nightmare of scanning, bag searches, and, of course, more questions than
a game show host.
The First Check: The "Why Are You Here?" Check
Alibaba entered the first checkpoint and was greeted by a stern officer.
"What's your business in Baghdad?" the officer asked, holding up a clipboard.
"Uh... I’m just going to the market," Alibaba said, confused.
"Open your bag," the officer ordered.
Alibaba opened his bag. Inside: some dates, a loaf of bread, a couple of coins,
and... a spare pair of socks.
The officer raised an eyebrow. "Socks? Are you planning on starting a sock busin
ess in the market?"
Alibaba smiled nervously. "No... I just like to be prepared."
"Fine, go ahead, but only because your socks seem innocent."
The Second Check: The "Do You Have Anything Sharp?" Check
Alibaba moved on to the next checkpoint, where a different officer asked him to
empty his pockets.
"Do you have any sharp objects?" the officer asked, squinting suspiciously.
"Sharp objects? No, just... my keys," Alibaba said, showing a small collection o
f keys, a spare keychain shaped like a camel, and a piece of candy.
"Let me see that keychain," the officer demanded, holding it up like it was a we
apon.
"Uhhh, it’s just a camel," Alibaba replied, sweat forming on his forehead.
"Right," said the officer, not at all convinced. "Just don’t try to use that c
amel as a weapon. Keep moving."
The Third Check: The "How Many Dates Do You Need?" Check
Alibaba thought he'd finally made it through the first few checks, but no! The t
hird checkpoint was manned by a very inquisitive officer who looked at his dates
suspiciously.
"How many dates do you need?" the officer asked, peering into Alibaba's bag.
"Uh... just enough for breakfast?" Alibaba replied, feeling a bit ridiculous.
The officer frowned. "Dates? How many is just enough? Are you planning to sell t
hem? You have a license for selling dates?"
Alibaba was starting to sweat. "No, no! I just like dates. I promise I’m not s
elling them!"
The officer eyed him one last time before letting him go. "Fine, but next time,
get a date permit. We’re cracking down on rogue date sellers."
The Twenty-Fifth Check: The "Are You Carrying Any Forbidden Items?" Check
By this point, Alibaba was feeling like he might just turn around and go home. B
ut, no, the next check was an officer holding up a metal detector wand.
"Are you carrying anything forbidden?" the officer asked, suspiciously.
"No, no, just me and my socks," Alibaba replied.
The officer slowly waved the wand over Alibaba's body. "Hmmm, seems clear... but
I’m going to have to check those socks."
Alibaba blinked. "You want to check my socks?"
"Yes, you never know. Last week we found a hidden falafel in someone's shoe. The
y were very suspicious."
Alibaba gave the officer a confused look. "Are you sure you want to check my soc
ks?"
"Yes," said the officer, determined. "It’s my job."
Alibaba’s socks passed the inspection, but only after an intense inspection of
their elasticity. He was then allowed to move on.
The Final Check: The "I Just Want to Buy Some Bread" Check
Finally, after forty checks — forty grueling, long, and sometimes absurd check
s — Alibaba reached the last security post. The officer here simply waved him
through.
"Alright, go ahead," the officer said. "Just one more thing..."
Alibaba froze, thinking they would ask him about his socks again.
"Do you want a coffee?" the officer asked, pointing to a small kiosk.
Alibaba blinked in disbelief. "Coffee? After all that?"
The officer nodded. "Trust me, it’s the best part of the whole security proces
s."
And so, Alibaba, tired and bewildered, finally made his way to the market with h
is bag full of dates, socks, and a small coffee. He thought to himself, Maybe ne
xt time, I’ll just order online.
As for the officers, they went back to their posts, ready to question the next p
oor soul who dared to enter Baghdad, all while secretly wondering if maybe, just
maybe, Alibaba had been hiding something behind those suspicious socks.
