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[132]Peter Gray Ph.D.

[133]Freedom to Learn

Kids Continued to Cope Well Two Months After Schools Closed

Two large surveys, a month apart, revealed family benefits of school
closures.

Posted Aug 18, 2020
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Image by Francis Ackson Soko on Wikimedia Commons
Source: Image by Francis Ackson Soko on Wikimedia Commons

Two weeks ago, I published an [135]article summarizing the results of a
survey of 800 parents and 800 children (ages 8 through 13) that was
conducted in April of 2020, approximately a month after most schools
had closed because of the pandemic. I noted that a second survey, of
another 800 parents and 800 children, was conducted a month later, in
May, using the same methodology. Both survey samples were
demographically representative of the U.S. population, across
geographic area, [136]gender of the child, race, and family income.
(For more about the method, see the previous post.)

Since then I have had a chance to look more closely at the May results
and compare them with April’s. My overall conclusion is that little
changed. Children and parents appeared to be doing at least as well in
May as they were in April. Here I will present the comparative data on
those questions that are most relevant to the conclusions presented in
the [137]previous post. Further discussion of each conclusion can be
found in that post.

Conclusion 1: Overall, children’s psychological wellbeing seemed to improve
after school closure.

Specific findings supporting this conclusion include the following:

• In April, 49 percent of the children agreed with the statement, “I
have been more calm than I was in regular school,” and only 25 percent
disagreed. (The rest were neutral). In May, the percentages were 51
percent agreed and 25 percent disagreed.

• In April, 43 percent percent of the parents agreed with the
statement, “My child is less [138]stressed now than before school
closed,” and 29 percent disagreed. (The rest were neutral). In May, the
percentages were 39 percent and 32 percent.

• In April, 85 percent of parents described their child as Happy during
the previous week (rating of 6 or above on a 10-point scale). In May,
that was 90 percent.

• On a list of adjectives to describe themselves over the past week, in
April, 62 percent of children checked Happy, 20 percent checked Sad,
and 10 percent checked Angry. In May, the percentages were 60
percent Happy, 17 percent Sad; and 12 percent Angry.

Conclusion 2: Children appeared to gain a greater sense of independence and
personal responsibility after school closure.

Specific findings supporting this conclusion include:

• In April, 71 percent of the children agreed with the statement, “I
have been finding new things to pass the time” and 13 percent
disagreed. (The rest were neutral). In May, the percentages were 74
percent agreed and 12 percent disagreed.

• In April, 71 percent of the children agreed with the statement, “My
parents have been letting me do more things on my own,” and 10 percent
disagreed. In May, the percentages were 72 percent agreed and 8 percent
disagreed.

• In April, 63 percent percent of parents indicated that their child
had developed new interests or skills over the past week, 86 percent
that their child had been fully immersed in some activity they enjoy,
78 percent that their child had helped with chores around the house,
and 67 percent that their child willingly undertook activities that
were new and/or a stretch for the child. (In each case agreement was a
rating of 6 or above on the 10-point scale). In May, these
percentages were 67 percent, 82 percent, 78 percent, and 70 percent,
respectively.

Conclusion 3: Parents gained a heightened appreciation of their children’s
capabilities.

Specific findings supporting this conclusion include:

• In April, on the checklist addressing “How does seeing how your child
is coping with this period make you feel?”, 49 percent checked Proud,
45 percent checked [139]Grateful, and 45 percent checked Impressed.” In
contrast, only 8 percent checked Annoyed and 6 percent Disappointed. In
May, these percentages were 63 percent Proud, 53 percent Grateful, 48
percent Impressed, 6 percent Annoyed, and 4 percent Disappointed. So,
in May parents were even prouder of their children than they had been
in April.

• In April, 73 percent agreed with the statement, “I am gaining a new
appreciation of my child’s capabilities” and only 5 percent disagreed.
In May 58 percent agreed and 12 percent disagreed. (Perhaps the decline
here, in May, is because they had already gained that appreciation the
previous month, so in May it wasn’t so much a “new appreciation.”)

Conclusion 4: Contrary to what many might expect, parenting for this sample
was not notably more difficult than parenting when children were in school.

Specific findings supporting this conclusion include:

• In April, 73 percent percent of parents disagreed with the statement,
“During the past week my child and I are having more conflicts”
(indicated by a rating of 5 or below on the 10-point scale). In May,
that was 82 percent. This is perhaps the most interesting finding of
all. With school closures, conflicts between children and parents
diminished, and they continued to diminish even more over time after
schools closed.

• In April, 47 percent of parents disagreed with the statement
“Pandemic [140]parenting is easier than parenting during normal times,”
24 percent agreed with it. (The rest were neutral). In May, 42 percent
disagreed and 27 percent agreed. In other words, in both samples fewer
than half of the parents reported parenting to be more difficult during
the pandemic than before.

Conclusion 5: Regardless of everything else, most children were looking
forward to going back to school—because they missed their friends.

• In April, 70 percent of the children agreed with the statement, “I
have been looking forward to going back to school,” 18 percent
disagreed. (The rest were neutral). In May, 73 percent agreed and 15
percent disagreed.

One of the open-ended questions invited children to write about what
they missed most about regular school. Of the 206 who responded to that
question in April, 82 percent said they missed seeing their friends; 13
percent said they missed one or more of their teachers; 7 percent
missed recess or sports; 3 percent missed music or art; 3 percent
mentioned some other type of class they missed or said they missed
classes in general; 2 percent said they missed nothing at all; and 1.5
percent said they missed lunch. I don’t yet have the list of kids’
responses to this question in May, but I have no reason to think it
would be much different.

Overall Conclusion

As I said in the first post of this two-part series, I have no doubt
that the pandemic has had devastating effects for some families. But
these two surveys indicate—contrary to many reports that are not based
on systematic studies—that the closing of schools and other
adult-organized activities for children, overall, benefitted more
children than it harmed.

As I have pointed out in many previous posts and academic articles, and
in my book Free to Learn, prior to the pandemic we were keeping
children so busy, and so stressed, with schooling and other adult-run
activities that they had little opportunity to do what children are
designed, biologically, to do—to play, explore, take
initiative, discover and pursue their own interests, and learn through
these self-directed ways.

I hope that we, as a society, can derive a lesson from this. Let’s
realize that the “normal” that people talk about when they talk about
getting back to something like what we had before the pandemic for
schooling is not “normal” biologically. We have, over decades,
gradually turned children’s lives into something that is not at all
normal for children. Normal means time to get bored, daydream, play,
discover, find and pursue your passions, and, yes, help out at home.

It is no surprise to me that the primary loss to children from school
closures was loss of opportunity to see their friends. Beyond what I
just listed, "normal" for children means having lots of time with
friends. Children were already deprived of that before the pandemic,
and even more so afterwards.

***

What are your thoughts and questions about all this? Do the findings of
this survey coincide, or not, with your observations concerning your
own children or other children you know? This blog is, among other
things, a forum for discussion. Your views and questions are treated
with respect by me and other readers. But please present them here in
the comments section (by clicking on the little comment balloon below),
not to me by email. By presenting them here, you help enlighten others,
not just me, and you give many people the chance to respond to your
questions. (And, I get way too many emails.)
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* 7COMMENTS

[141]CADO (Confined Animal Distracting Operations)

Submitted by Anonymous on August 18, 2020 - 9:46am

If, when momentarily free of schools distractiveness, a young person
were to "bump into" a worthy passion, through which they found inner
satisfaction vs. the systems external motivational bribes and through
the net found others pursuing a similar passion, might this opportunity
of sharing common concerns and goals, provide them a deeper connection
with life, than if their team wins the super something ?
* [142]Reply to Anonymous
* [143]Quote Anonymous

[144]If this is true, most teachers are functionally useless

Submitted by anonymous on August 18, 2020 - 11:49am

With remote learning, you only need the best teachers and education
will flow to the best in a Zipfian distribution. All the lemons will be
squeezed. It's going to be even worse news for college profs. The good
but not the best teachers will function as study aides, not lecturers.
* [145]Reply to anonymous
* [146]Quote anonymous

[147]more understanding of each other

Submitted by Kelly on August 18, 2020 - 12:35pm

My son had never been happy at school, although he got along well with
the children there, he despised the teachers and the inflexibility of
the whole thing. He told me that even though he liked seeing his
friends there, he didn't miss school, and he'd rather never go back.
Rather than have him do virtual school that would take 8:30-3:00 every
day, we decided to homeschool for this year. What I didn't realize
before was how stressed and trapped I, as a parent, felt when we were
part of the school system. I dreaded squabbling over homework with my
son and getting complaints from his teachers, and it definitely
affected my relationship with him. With my son and I both feeling so
much more relaxed now, he is growing and learning in new ways and we
are getting along better than ever. I thought I would feel more
restricted doing homeschooling but instead I feel such a sense of
freedom and my son seems like a different kid entirely. He just wanted
to be listened to, to have his feelings considered, to have time to do
what he wants and explore his interests. I have no idea why I didn't
think of it that way before.
* [148]Reply to Kelly
* [149]Quote Kelly

[150]is it only friends, or is school important to them

Submitted by K on August 18, 2020 - 12:45pm

I wonder if schools had closed for some reason that didn't prohibit
social interaction, whether the kids still would have said they wanted
to go back to school. Many kids have been pretty isolated during this
time and are probably thinking at least at school they could see their
friends. If they had been able to see their friends all along, would
they still have wanted to go back to school? It's possible, I think,
because many kids have been convinced that school is very important and
necessary and that if you don't go there you'll wind up stupid and poor
later in life.
* [151]Reply to K
* [152]Quote K

[153]Understanding

Submitted by Dick Gallien on August 18, 2020 - 1:25pm

Beautiful Kelly. John Holt, the most insightful person on how kids
grow, concluded after his first 2 of 10 books on schooling, that
schools aren't going to change, weren't meant to change and education
isn't their purpose. He also realized that parents as sensitive as you,
are more apt to trust your son, to "bump into" things that he is
excited about and become self directed. I hated school, but when 15 I
"bumped into" a small farm, bought the adjoining farm 64 yrs. ago, with
a wife and 2 kids and am still passionate about turning all of Winona,
Mn. "waste wood" into mostly biochar and some lumber on this farm. The
answers I'm after aren't found in schools, especially forestry schools.
Life is interesting---schools aren't.
* [154]Reply to Dick Gallien
* [155]Quote Dick Gallien

[156]I would say that your

Submitted by anonymous on August 18, 2020 - 9:40pm

I would say that your experience is not universal. I loved school -
especially classes that were not just memorization drills (like some of
my early math classes). In high school and college, I took the most
difficult classes I could handle in every area because I was curious
and didn't yet know what I wanted to do.

I ended up becoming a scientist, but because I had a love of literature
and first learned to do rigorous analysis of literature, I look at
things a little differently than most scientists, which has often
helped me see solutions that aren't apparent to others. In my career, I
have to learn constantly, since research is on the frontier of human
knowledge.

What I completely agree with the article on is the need for time to
think and experiment as part of childhood and life. I hope the pandemic
experience will bring a realization that humans are not made to be
efficient and that the lack of efficiency (or increased free time) is
of far greater benefit to individuals and society than trying to pack
more and more into childhood and life.
* [157]Reply to anonymous
* [158]Quote anonymous

[159]Tchrs. are useless, except as a distraction and guards.

Submitted by Dick Gallien on August 18, 2020 - 9:38pm

When someone's employment is dependent on "watching after" someone
elses kids, confinement is the easiest, safest method.As kids move into
our democratic-compulsory school system, taken from the
German-Prussians as the most efficient system for controlling the
masses, the same system that allowed an Austrian sch. drop out to lead
the well schooled German's into WW 2; the same system that allowed the
well schooled U.S. citizens to elect "it", it takes an
indoctrination far beyond any religion that most of us have
experienced, to believe that as certified teacher-guards, the piece of
life that they teach their prisoners about, has any impact on their
lives other than a distraction as they go deeper in debt, for a piece
of paper. This is my signature line.
Prison bars do the confining, allowing the prisoner a mental freedom
not possible in schools, where an endless barrage of assignments,
lectures, questions and tests, serve the same purpose, under the guise
of education, while distracting as efficiently as the cracking of
whips, keeping the imprisoned from discovering and pursuing their
passions, or noticing that there are no real bars------and by the time
they might realize the purpose of their confinement, it is too late.

Curiosity is the cure for boredom. School is the cure for curiosity.
* [160]Reply to Dick Gallien
* [161]Quote Dick Gallien

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About the Author

Peter Gray, Ph.D., is a research professor at Boston College, author
of Free to Learn and the textbook Psychology (now in 8th edition), and
founding member of the nonprofit Let Grow.
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