Archive Maintainer : Slight update to fix some very stupid bugs

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Archive Maintainer : Slight update to fix some very stupid bugs
Advanced engine needed : Any limit removing port (but see below)
Primary purpose : Single play
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Title : Extra Beany Canned Doom
Filename : CANNED.WAD
Release date : May 13, 2024
Author : Stupid Bunny
Email Address : [redacted]
Other Files By Author : Hellward Bound (2008), Dead Outpost (2010), the Mortal
Soul maps; contributions to TNT: Revilution,
Claustrophobia 1024 2, 30 SCREAMS TO MAP
Misc. Author Info : Look up a Commander Keen mod called "Clouds Unseen"
Description :

********************************************************
--- IMPORTANT ---
COMPATABILITY SHIT
********************************************************

* Play in any limit-removing port
** But primarily tested in/targeted for Crispy Doom
* Mouselook/freelook permitted, that's how I tested it
* Jumping and crouching are NOT allowed

The mapset is primarily tested in Crispy Doom, and works best in that
port. It is known to work in GZDoom and DSDA with below settings. It
should be compatible in most ports since most support/come with these
settings.

READ THIS!!!!!
| | |
V V V

If you are playing in Crispy, DSDA, Nugget, or Woof!, then you shouldn't
need to worry about any of this and can skip to the fun bits

Since couple of maps take advantage of weird gimmicks like ghost
monsters and some obscure-ish bugs with floor movement, make sure the
following settings are set to YES in your favorite port:

REQUIRED SETTINGS!!!!
*** Use exactly Doom's floor motion behavior
*** Ghost monsters on

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED SETTINGS:
+ Infinitely tall actors off
+ Lost soul limit off (you know you want to)

SETTINGS THAT I LIKE AND TESTED WITH BUT AREN'T NECESSARY REALLY:
- Freelook enabled/autoaim disabled (if you use a mouse)
- Playing with -pistolstart parameter (supported by Crispy, DSDA,
Woof!, some others)

I have the COMPLVL lump in there so if you are using a current version
of GZDoom, DSDA, Nugget, Woof!, or some others then it *should* set some
of these for you. However it may be good to check them nonetheless
because a couple maps WILL break otherwise, and COMPLVL support is still
rudimentary in GZDoom.

So now...

********************************************************

W W EEEEE L CCC UUU M M BBBBB !
W W E L C C U U MM MM B !
W W W EEEE L C U U M M M BBBB !
W W W E L C C U U M M B
W W EEEEE LLLLL CCC UUU M M BBBBB !

********************************************************

This is a FULL 32 MAP MEGAWAD of funky, gimmicky and mostly small
limit-removing maps with a wide variety of themes, ideas, and gameplay
styles. There's a bit of something in here for everybody: run-and-gun
action, suspense and atmosphere, slaughter, indoor maps, outdoor maps,
hell maps, space maps, classic-style, '94-style and a lot of whackadoo
shit I can't even give a description to, to name just a few. You'll
just have to grab a spoon and can opener and see for yourself!

Why "Extra Beany Canned Doom"? Because:

- Like beans, the maps are small and proteiny
- Also like beans, there are exactly 32 of them
- Like canned food, the maps are quick to make and play
- Like Doom, the maps are full of Doom enemies and textures
- "Beany" is a funny word lol beany
- I actually hate beans so I'm motivated to make the maps extra good to
compensate

DIFFICULTY LEVELS (balanced by someone who's bad at Doom):

ITYTD Go for it! A nice way to casually experience the maps
with minimal pressure or frustration.
HNTR Same as HMP, but with fewer monsters. Balanced to be a
gentle challenge for people who are new or just want a
relaxed time
HMP The "default" difficulty, and recommended for a first play-
through. Same monster count as UV but with more kit
UV It will get pretty hard sometimes but definitely not god
level. Same monster count as HMP but with less health/ammo/
arms
N! lol no

As insinuated above, maps are overwhelmingly tested from pistol start.
They are also kind of a hodgepodge of themes and ideas with only a vague
upwards difficulty curve. What this means is don't be afraid to idclev
to the next map if you aren't enjoying the one you're on now--there's
kind of something in here for everybody, which inevitably means there is
something everyone will hate, too. (But hopefully more of the former.)

----------------------------STORY-------------------------------

Behold, the miracle of birth! Today we are witness to
the hatching of the doomguy from its egg, truly one of
the wonders of nature. Watch as it eats the gibs left
behind by its mother, made of the remains of her mate.

What lies ahead for this young doomguy as it emerges
from its nest? Most likely, ripping and tearing, and
the struggle for survival that all beasts must face.
The little doomguy wastes no time: look, a chainsaw
left behind by loggers! Time for him to go gather some
tasty, juicy gibs of his own, before the next mating
season commences.

--------------------LEVEL DESCRIPTIONS---------------------------

***Skip this if you like going in completely helplessly blind***

Build times are mostly estimated since I didn't actually track my time
that closely. Times don't count lots of post-playtest futzing and
tweaking so take them with some salty grains you know

-- EPISODE I: HELL IS EARTH --------------------------------------------

MAP01: Intro to Forestry
Build time: 2.5 hours
Finished: 12/17/2021
Kill all of the invasive demons ruining this beautiful peaceful forest

MAP02: Beware the Beast Man
Build time: 5 hours
Finished: 1/6/2022
...for he is the Devil?s pawn. Alone among God?s primates, he kills for
sport or lust or greed. Yea, he will murder his brother to possess his
brother?s land. Let him not breed in great numbers, for he will make a
desert of his home and yours. Shun him; drive him back into his jungle
lair, for he is the harbinger of death.

MAP03: Bad Neighbo(u)rs
Build time: 1.5 hours + like 3 more hours making it look pretty and stuff
Finished: 8/27/2022
This is the last time they don't give your lawnmower back! Get in there
and teach the deadbeats a lesson

MAP04: Gnatsies
Build time: 2 hours
Finished: 11/21/2021
The UAC has made friends with someone even more horrible than the Devil!
Get in there and kill the shit out of their fascist asses

MAP05: Toxin Command Processing
Build time: 6 hours
Finished: 9/22/2022
Essential part of the Phobos Base, located just down the road from
the Station Control Lab Anomaly Center

MAP06: The T.T.P. Project
Build time: 2.5 hours
Finished: 12/17/2021
What does "TTP" stand for? Anyway see what the UAC scientists have been
cooking up, and maybe stop it or something idk

MAP07: Carnival Games
Build time: 2 hours
Finished: 12/2/2021
Yay, the carnival's in town! Let's head to the fairgrounds down by the
blood treatment plant and have ourselves a rip snortin good time

MAP08: Knot Seize
Build time: 4 hours
Finished: 2/9/2023
Not another Nazi fortress! Seize Fort Knot and destroy the evil within

MAP09: Fort Doomguy
Build time: 3-4 hours
Finished: 11/21/2021
Sneak in, neutralize the enemy, and get the hell out. And don't get
burned by the sentries

MAP10: Cyber Bullies
Build time: 3 hours
Finished: 9/24/2022
Those mean ol cyberdouches chased you into the tunnels under the school
and are about to give you the swirlie of a lifetime! See if you can get
the drop on them and finally give them their comeuppance

MAP11: Bikini Atoll
Build time: 5 hours
Finished: 2/10/2023
Uh oh, looks like it's not the way your grandpa remembers it when he
visited in 1954 :( I guess this is one island vacation you won't be
relaxing through

-- EPISODE II: INFERNAL AFFAIRS ----------------------------------------

MAP12: Stairway to Hell
Build time: 7 hours
Finished: 2/26/2023
Don't let your knees get sore going down all these stairs

MAP13: Cathedral of Rust
Build time: 3.5 hours
Finished: 12/25/2021
Throw the Three Holy Switches of Oxidation and enter the Corroded
Sanctuary to kill the Big Rusty Bishops within, only then will the
sacrament of Eucharust be complete

MAP14: Keen Mustn't Die!
Build time: 3.5 hours
Finished: 9/16/2022
Pro-Gannalech extremists have kidnapped a bunch of Commander Keens! Get
in there, save the Billys and neutralize the terrorist threat. And be
careful, if all the hostages die then the ATF will bust in and handle
things their way

MAP15: Fortress of Mystery
Build time: 2 hours
Finished: 12/10/2021
An ancient tale of demonic rivalry, mystery, and fortresses plays out in
slightly new form. Maybe with a new mystery or two to boot

MAP16: You Asked for This
Build time: 2 hours
Finished: 9/23/2023
Doomguy decides it's time to check out some monster poles
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This map was made in response to a poll that Clippy did
in which folks chose their favorite monster, tournament style until one
was the winner. The number of times they appear here is exactly as many
as they appeared in the tournament, so logically the more of them there
are the more well liked they should be. Enjoyyyyyy

MAP17: map01.wad
Build time: 6 hours
Finished: 9/18/2022
sup im new here anyway this is just some stupid shit i through together
check it out or dont watever idc www.fileorangutan.rs/f/69420/map01.wad

MAP18: Angry Chair
Build time: 1.5 hours
Finished: 11/15/2021
Sitting on an angry chair
Now Doomguy wants to sit there
But first he'll get a nasty scare
SPIDERS AND ARCHIES FOR DAYS (heeeey)
STOP READING THIS NONSENSE AND PLAY (hooooooo)
AUTHOR'S NOTE: The map that started all this madness. The one with the
shortest build time and still probably the best of the lot

MAP19: Kill the Fat Marshal
Build time: 3-4 hours
Finished: 8/21/2022
Find and kill Hermann Goring, shoot Hitler right in his face and end
this Nazi shit once and for all

MAP20: Satan's PC
Build time: 12 hours
Finished: 2/3/2023
Satan's computer has a virus...and it's YOU! Defeat Satan's antivirus
and brick his PC before he DMs photos of your feet to everyone on
Doomworld

-- EPISODE III: SPACE MADNESS ------------------------------------------

MAP21: SPACE!!!111!!11!one!
Build time: 6 hours
Finished: 12/19/2023
You arrive in the FUTURE where you board a big shiny space station,
expecting to meet lots of friendly and helpful humans that will give you
hugs, and not monsters or anything lame like that

MAP22: The Demon Dig
Build time: 3.5 hours
Finished: 11/29/2021
Doomguy came for donuts and all he got was some kind of shitty open pit
mining project full of demons

MAP23: Chromoid Labs, 1024
Build time: 3 hours
Finished: 12/17/2021
Dr. Archibald V. Ile has been collecting research grants for years and
the endowment wants you to go in and see what their funding has been
going towards. Whatever it is it fucking sure better not be demon
related

MAP24: Call of the Shadows
Build time: 7 hours
Finished: 3/14/2023
In the shadowy Archaean lava tubes of the Moon you find a long-abandoned
UAC base. What killed the researchers who had been based here? Do I even
need to ask? Fun fact shadows are darker on the Moon due to lack of
atmospheric light scattering

MAP25: Gorignak
Build time: 7 hours
Finished: 9/18/2022
Those damn dirty aliens have thrown you in the execution pit. Can you
survive the onslaught of their battle beasts?

MAP26: The Imp*erial Engine
Build time: 6 hours give or take many many many hours of tweaking
Finished: 10/3/2023
You find yourself at the heart of a great and terrible machine. You
don't know what it does, but you should probably hit the STOP button
before the imp-lications of its power become clear

MAP27: Dome of Darkness
Build time: 12 hours
Finished: 3/21/2023
Survive the challenges that lie within the Dome. Grappling hook and
Second Dome not included

MAP28: Panopticon
Build time: Around 16 hours
Finished: 5/11/2024
A utopian City of Tomorrow under the stewardship of the Great Eye, the
Watchful Guardian, It who once awakened shall never sleep. Built to
guard the inhabitants against the terrors of Hell, It believes that the
only cure for a scourge of demons, is an even bigger scourge of demons

MAP29: Fever Dream
Build time: a million billion hours
Finished: 4/18/2024
"Oh no, I think I have the flu", urghles Doomguy as he rolls into bed,
"Or maybe it was all those baked bean and sauerkraut pizzas I just ate."
Either way, it's gonna be a rough night ahead for our hero and the brave
wastebasket by his bedside

MAP30: The Many-Eyed God
Build time: 12 hours
Finished: 3/9/2024
Confront the final evil in its Doomy lair, and reckon that there is no
escape but still there may yet be victory....

Additional Credits to : ***Full credits in CREDITS.TXT***
===========================================================================
* What is included *

New levels : 32
Sounds : No
Music : Yes
Graphics : Yes
Dehacked/BEX Patch : Text strings only (also made hanging corpses un-
blocking because who needs that shit)
Demos : Yes
Other : COMPLVL lump (vanilla), OPTIONS if you run this in
MBF21
Other files required : DOOM2.WAD, a sourceport, an operating system

* Play Information *

Game : Doom II
Map # : MAP01-32
Single Player : Designed for
Cooperative 2-4 Player : No
Deathmatch 2-4 Player : No
Other game styles : Whatever crazy mods the kids are using these days
Difficulty Settings : Yes

* Construction *

Base : New from scratch
Build Time : 1.5-10ish hours per map, mostly
Editor(s) used : UDB, SLADE, DoomMake, WhackEd 4
Known Bugs : * Probably some errant slimetrails around
* Teleports in MAP31 sometimes get clogged by bigger
monsters
* The BFG in a couple maps is prone to triggering the
all-ghosts bug in Crispy
May Not Run With : Go up to the big "READ THIS" heading to make sure you
know how to make the maps work right
Tested With : Primarily and works best in Crispy Doom; also DSDA,
Eternity, GZDoom, PRBoom+

* Copyright / Permissions *

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-
NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. To view a copy of this license, visit
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/4.0/

You are free to copy and redistribute the material in any medium or format
for any purpose, EXCEPT commercially. If you do so, you must give appropriate
credit, provide a link to the license, and indicate if changes were made. You
may do so in any reasonable manner, but not in any way that suggests the
licensor endorses you or your use. You may NOT use the material for commercial
purposes. If you remix, transform, or build upon the material, you may NOT
distribute the modified material.

* Where to get these stupid maps *

The Usual: ftp://archives.gamers.org/pub/idgames/ and mirrors
Web sites:
FTP sites: